Standing in a room full of people to deliver a eulogy for a loved one is one of life's most challenging tasks. The weight of finding the right words to honor a life well-lived can be overwhelming. It’s nerve-wracking — but it’s also an honor.

You want to do your best to get it right. And we’re here to help.

This article contains practical advice and inspiration (plus, some funeral speech examples) to help you write a heartfelt and memorable eulogy.

Whether you're a skilled orator or someone who struggles with public speaking, these steps will guide you through the process of writing a funeral speech for a family member or a friend — something that truly celebrates their life.

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Step-by-Step Guide to Writing a Funeral Speech

From gathering memories and structuring your speech to writing with authenticity and emotion, here are the steps you can take to find the support you need to write a funeral speech for family members.

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Step 1: Gather information and inspiration

Start by gathering memories, stories, and anecdotes. Make notes of what you feel about them. Reach out to family members and close friends to collect their memories and stories. Ask them about the moments that stood out, the qualities they admired, and the experiences that made an impact. 

These personal insights will provide the foundation for your eulogy, ensuring that it reflects the individuality and spirit of the person you’re honoring.

Additionally, spend time reviewing old photos, letters, and personal belongings. These items can stir memories and bring to mind moments you might want to include in your speech. 

Photos can remind you of significant events, travels, and achievements, while letters and other mementos might reveal your loved one’s thoughts, values, or personality in ways that words alone cannot. 

This process will help gather content and provide a comforting way to connect with your memories during this difficult time.

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Step 2: Structure the eulogy

Once you’ve gathered your thoughts and stories, the next step is to structure the eulogy in a way that flows logically and emotionally. A well-organized speech helps to convey your message clearly and keeps the audience engaged.

Here are some typical components of a eulogy:

• Introduction: Begin with a brief introduction that acknowledges the gathering and sets the tone for the eulogy. You might start by introducing yourself, especially if not everyone in the audience knows you. 
  
  Then, briefly mention who the departed was to you (a parent, sibling, or friend) and touch on their importance in your life. You could include a quote, a poem, or a reflection that resonates with the person’s life.
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• Main body: This is the heart of your eulogy, where you share the memories, stories, and qualities that defined your loved one. Consider organizing the main body thematically or chronologically. 
  
  For example, you could focus on different aspects of their life — such as their childhood, career, hobbies, and relationships — or you might choose to highlight their character traits, like kindness, humor, or perseverance. Use the anecdotes and stories you’ve gathered to illustrate these points, making sure to balance lighter moments with more serious reflections.
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• Conclusion: Bring your thoughts together with a final reflection on your loved one’s life. This could be a summary of the impact they had on those around them or a message of hope and remembrance for the future. 
  
  You might also close with a quote, a final wish, or a call to action, encouraging those present to honor the deceased’s memory in their own lives.
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Organizing your thoughts (logically and emotionally) is crucial to delivering a eulogy that feels cohesive and heartfelt. 

Start by listing the key points you want to cover, such as specific memories, qualities, and messages. Then, arrange these points in a way that feels natural and emotionally resonant. 

For example, you might start with lighter, more joyful memories and gradually move toward more profound reflections, allowing the audience to journey with you through a range of emotions.

Remember, the goal is not to create a perfect speech but to convey your genuine feelings and memories in a way that honors your loved one. Take the time to structure your eulogy thoughtfully.

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Step 3: Personalize the eulogy

This step makes your speech really resonate with those in attendance. Personalization honors the departed and provides comfort and connection to those who are grieving. Here’s how you can achieve that:

• Highlight achievements, hobbies, and passions: Reflect on the major achievements in your loved one’s life. This could include career milestones, personal accomplishments, or contributions to their community. 
  
  Discussing these achievements shows how they made a difference in the world and the lives of those around them. For example, if your loved one was passionate about volunteering, you could share stories of the impact they had on the lives they touched through their service. 
  
  ‍If they were an avid gardener, you might talk about how their love for plants brought beauty into the lives of friends and family, perhaps even sharing a story about a particularly beloved garden or plant they tended to.
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• Use personal anecdotes to illustrate character and impact: Personal anecdotes bring to life the character and impact of the person being remembered. These stories can be humorous, touching, or a mix of both. 
  
  For example, you might share a story about a time when their sense of humor lightened a difficult situation or how their kindness helped a friend through a tough time. These anecdotes help highlight their personality and remind everyone present of the moments they shared.
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• Respect and integrate cultural traditions: Consider and respect any cultural or religious traditions that were significant to your loved one. This might involve incorporating specific rituals, prayers, or symbols into the eulogy or the service itself. 
  
  For instance, in some cultures, it’s customary to read a particular prayer or poem, light candles, or play a certain type of music. If your loved one was deeply connected to their cultural heritage, integrate these elements to make the eulogy more meaningful.
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• Quotes, poetry, or song lyrics: Do this to add depth and resonance to your eulogy. Choose words that reflect the spirit of your loved one or that express sentiments you find difficult to put into your own words.
  
  For example, you might include a line from a favorite poem that they loved or that perfectly captures their outlook on life. A short, meaningful quote can serve as a powerful conclusion to a section of your eulogy, helping to tie together the memories and themes you’ve discussed.

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Step 4: Write with emotion and authenticity

Writing a eulogy is not just about recounting facts; it’s about conveying emotions and memories associated with your loved one. Here are some points to keep in mind:

• A well-rounded eulogy often incorporates a mix of emotions — there’s room for humor, sentiment, and solemn reflection. Humor can provide relief in a heavy moment and remind everyone of the joy the person brought into their lives. 
  
  For example, sharing a funny anecdote can lighten the mood and help the audience connect with the memories in a positive way. However, it’s important to ensure that the humor is respectful and appropriate to the setting.
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• Emotion and solemnity should also be present, as these reflect the seriousness of the occasion and the depth of your feelings. Share moments of tenderness, gratitude, and love, allowing yourself to be vulnerable. The audience will connect with your sincerity, and it will help them process their own emotions as well.
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• When writing your eulogy, speak from the heart. Use simple, direct language that conveys your feelings honestly. Instead of trying to impress with elaborate words, focus on being sincere and true to your emotions. Think about what you truly want to say to honor your loved one, and let that guide your words.
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• Don’t be afraid to show your emotions as you write — tears and laughter are both part of the grieving process. If you’re comfortable, let these emotions flow into your writing. This authenticity will resonate with your audience and make your speech more impactful.
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• It’s easy to fall into using clichés when writing a eulogy, but try to avoid them where possible. Phrases like “they’re in a better place” or “they’ll always be with us” can feel impersonal and overused. 
  
  Instead, focus on what made your loved one unique. Highlight their quirks, their habits, the little things that defined them — these are what the audience will remember and cherish.
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• Describe specific moments or traits that capture the individual’s essence. For example, rather than saying someone was kind, describe a time when they went out of their way to help someone else. These details bring the person to life in the minds of those listening and create a more personal and meaningful tribute.

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Step 5: Craft a compelling opening and closing

Your opening should draw the audience in and make them feel connected from the start. You might begin with a powerful quote, a heartfelt memory, or a statement that captures your loved one’s spirit. 

For example, you could start with, “When I think of [Name], I’m reminded of how they always had a way of making everyone in the room feel seen and valued.” This immediately sets a warm, reflective tone.

Another approach could be to acknowledge the difficulty of the moment while expressing gratitude for those who have come to honor the person who has passed away. This helps to unify the audience in shared purpose and emotion.

The closing of your eulogy is your final opportunity to leave the audience with something meaningful. You may end with a message of hope, a reflection on the person’s lasting impact, or a call to action — encouraging those present to carry forward the values and love that their loved one embodied.

For example, you could conclude with, “Let us remember [Name] not just today, but in the way we live our lives — in kindness, in joy, and love, just as they did.” This provides a sense of continuity and honors their legacy.

Alternatively, you might end with a simple, heartfelt goodbye or a moment of silence to allow everyone to reflect on their own memories.

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Funeral Speech Examples for Various Relationships

We’ve put together a few funeral-speech examples that you could gain inspiration from when writing your own.

These examples are entirely fictional and have been created for illustrative purposes only. Our goal is to inspire and guide you as you write something of your own.

Any resemblance to real persons, living or deceased, is purely coincidental. Please use these examples as a starting point to craft a personalized and meaningful tribute that truly captures the essence of your loved one’s life and legacy.

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1. Eulogy example for a parent

"My father, Robert 'Bob' Caldwell, was a man of few words. He taught me more through his quiet determination than any lecture ever could. As I stand here today, I'm reminded of the countless weekends we spent in his workshop, the smell of sawdust filling the air as he patiently guided my clumsy hands through each project.

“Dad never sought the spotlight, but his impact on our community was undeniable. For 30 years, he volunteered at the local animal shelter, arriving every Saturday morning without fail to walk the dogs no one else wanted to. I remember him coming home once, covered in mud and wearing the biggest grin, because he'd finally gotten 'Old Grumpy' (our notoriously difficult bulldog) to play fetch.

“My father's love for our family was as steady as his workshop routine. He may not have said 'I love you' often, but he showed it in a thousand little ways - from never missing a single one of my terrible middle school band concerts to learning to bake the world's most lopsided birthday cakes when Mom was ill.

“In his final days, as we sat together watching his beloved Red Sox, he turned to me and said, 'You know, kiddo, I think I did alright.' Dad, you did more than alright. You showed us all how to live with integrity, kindness, and purpose. Your legacy lives on in the values you instilled in us and the countless lives you touched. 

“Rest easy, Dad. We'll take it from here."

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2. Eulogy example for a spouse

"Maria Gonzalez was not just my wife. She was my North Star and the love of my life for 37 incredible years. When we met at that crowded college party, I never imagined that the woman who accidentally spilled her drink on me would become the person I couldn't imagine living without.

“Maria had this infectious laugh that could light up a room. I swear, half the neighborhood knew when she found something funny. Her passion for life was matched only by her compassion for others. As a pediatric nurse, she touched countless lives, and I lost count of the times former patients would stop us in the grocery store to thank her.

“She turned our house into a warm, welcoming haven, not just for our kids but for every stray friend or neighbor who needed a safe place. Her famous 'emergency enchiladas' became legendary; I think she fed most teenagers in town over the years.

“Maria faced her illness with the same grace and humor that she approached everything in life with. Even on her toughest days, she'd find a way to make her doctors laugh or comfort a fellow patient. In our last conversation, she made me promise to keep her garden alive and to never, ever attempt to cook her secret salsa recipe.

“My love, I will miss your terrible puns, your off-key singing in the shower, and the way you always knew exactly what I needed before I did. The world is dimmer without your light, but I promise to keep shining it forward in your memory.”

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3. Eulogy example for a child

"Our sweet Lily was only with us for six short years, but in that time, she filled our lives with more joy, laughter, and love than we ever thought possible. From the moment she entered this world, with her bright eyes and curious fingers, Lily had a way of making everyone around her smile.

“Lily was our little adventurer. She approached life with an enthusiasm that was both inspiring and, frankly, a little exhausting on some days. I'll never forget the day we found her in the backyard, covered head to toe in mud, proudly showing off the 'fairy house' she'd built for the garden squirrels. Her imagination knew no bounds.

“Despite the challenges she faced with her health, Lily never lost her spark. Even during hospital stays, she'd insist on wearing her favorite tutu and tiara, declaring herself a princess. The nurses adored her, often sneaking in extra Jell-O cups just to see her face light up.

“In her final days, Lily taught us about courage and grace beyond her years. She worried more about comforting us than herself, always ready with a hug and her favorite phrase: ‘I’m okay, Mommy and Daddy.'

“Lily, my darling, you were right. You’re okay now. You’re better than okay; you showed us how to find joy in every moment and love in every challenge. We'll carry you with us always, our beautiful, brave little girl."

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4. Eulogy example for a sibling

"My brother, Marcus, was more than just my older sibling — he was my protector, my confidant, and quite often, my partner in mischief. Growing up, there was no adventure too daring, no tree too high to climb, as long as Marcus was by my side.

“As we got older, our adventures changed, but our bond grew stronger. Marcus had this uncanny ability to show up exactly when you needed him. I can't count the number of times he appeared at my door with a pint of ice cream and a terrible movie, somehow knowing I'd had a rough day.

“Marcus lived life with a truly unmatched passion. He threw himself wholeheartedly into everything he did, whether it was mastering a new recipe in the kitchen (his paella was legendary), training for marathons, or fighting for causes he believed in. His work with local youth programs changed countless lives, and I know many of those kids saw in Marcus the same hero I always did.

“In our last conversation, Marcus made me promise to keep living life to the fullest and to keep seeking out new adventures. He said, 'Life's too short for regrets, sis. Make it count.' And that's exactly what I intend to do.

“As we remember Marcus today, I ask each of you to take a moment to appreciate the loved ones in your life. Let's honor Marcus's memory by cherishing every moment we have with those we care about, just as he did.

“Now, I invite you all to join me in a moment of silence. Let's reflect on the joy he brought to our lives and the lessons he taught us about living fully and loving deeply.

[Pause for a moment of silence]

“Thank you. Let's carry Marcus's spirit of adventure, laughter, and love with us always. May we all strive to 'make it count' in our own lives, just as he did in his."

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5. Eulogy example for a friend

"I stand here today to celebrate the life of my dear friend, Jasmine Chen. A force of nature — brilliant, passionate, and fiercely loyal.

“Our friendship began 20 years ago in college, in the chemistry lab. She saved our experiment from disaster with quick thinking and a fire extinguisher, grinning, 'Well, that's one way to break the ice.'

“Jasmine approached everything with determination and humor. From groundbreaking research to organizing charity runs in ridiculous costumes, she poured her whole heart into it. She brought people together, creating family wherever she went.

“I'll miss our coffee dates when we'd solve the world's problems. Well, at least we’d leave feeling like we did. Jasmine made you feel heard and understood, even when challenging your perspective. Her curious mind always sought to understand more about the world and its people.

“Jasmine lived by her favorite Toni Morrison quote: 'If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else.' And she did. Her research will impact lives for years, but her greatest legacy is the love and inspiration she left in all of us.

“To my dear friend: Thank you for sharing your joy, support, and for showing us how to live with purpose. We'll honor you by embracing life with your enthusiasm. As you'd say, quoting your beloved David Bowie, 'I don't know where I'm going from here, but I promise it won't be boring.' Your impact will continue to ripple outwards, Jasmine. Rock on, my friend."

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Meadow Gives More Opportunities to Honor a Loved One Your Way

We hope this helps you find the right words for the funeral speech, whether for a family member or a friend. We encourage you to use the eulogy examples as a starting point. 

Here at Meadow, we specialize in compassionate and meaningful memorial planning.

Our comprehensive packages and support help you create a memorial service to reflect your loved one's spirit. We allow you to honor their memory on your terms because:

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• We’re with you at every step. A brief call allows us to understand your needs and preferences. We'll then pair you with a professional memorial planner who will be your dedicated guide throughout the process.
  
  
• We focus on what matters. Our planner will handle all the logistics, from venue selection to vendor coordination, so you can focus on what matters most — spending time with loved ones.
  
  
• We take care of the details. Your dedicated planner will manage everything from food and flowers, sending invitations, booking catering, and managing your photo slideshow for the event.
  
  
• We customize. Tell us about your loved one's personality and interests. We create unique events to reflect their life for a truly personal celebration.
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• We’re transparent. Our cremation package is $1,295, and you can add on a memorial service package starting at $1,970.
  
  

Let us help you create a beautiful and lasting tribute to your loved one. 

‍Explore our personalized memorial services.